Song to a spillage (part 1)

This isa song written by John Kirkpatrick (a famous folk music artist) around 50 years ago. Over the years I've performed it many times at the Monday music sessions. But it works well as a poem!

EDDIE BAKER'S MUCKSPREADER (John Kirkpatrick)

1. Now in Mytholmroyd in Yorkshire, one Saturday in June
All the village was preparing for the fete that afternoon
There were sideshows, stalls and roundabouts, and every kind of game
But the village fete will never now be quite the same again
For upon that country scene, there appeared a machine
Which belonged to Eddie Baker from the farm just down the road
With his tractor and his trailer and his load so sweet and pure
Five hundred imperial gallons of best liquified manure

Chorus
Down the road went Eddie Baker in his rattling old boneshaker
And he never knew the trail he left behind him

2. Now Eddie quickly picked up speed on the track from Low Lumb Farm
Though his load careered madly he never thought 'twould come to harm
And so noisy was the clatter and the crashes and the booms
He had to turn his old transistor up so he could hear the tunes
As he zoomed across a bump it triggered off the trailer's pump
And its hose discovered freedom it had never known before
It waved wildly round and round, from side to side and up and down
As spreading dung and desperation, Eddie sailed into the town

3. Now Jemima Smith and Barney, from down the old folks home
Were on their way to a lunchtime tipple at the Peacock & Trombone
She was adjusting of her spectacles to admire a garden rose
When a blast from Eddie's onslaught whipped them right from off her nose
"Oh Gawd" says old Jemima, "I've just had a funny turn"
"Oh I feel all cold and clammy and how my skin does burn"
"Oh speak up dear" says Barney, as together they did cling
"It's short-circuited my deaf-aid, I can't hear a bleeding thing"

4. Now the Ice Cream Factory Silver Band were warming up to play
To commence the celebration of that very special day
When there appeared upon their music dots they couldn't play too well
As with the gentle tang of Brasso mixed a new exciting smell
And their tunes all went awry as they hung them out to dry
And the sousaphone player played his last cos he sucked when he should have blowed
There were different tunes in different times and all in different keys
And "Nellie the Elephant" sounded more like "The Flight of the Bumble Bee"

Part 2 to follow......