WI September Meeting Report

Audlem WI – September Members Meeting

Strong Women

I have a friend who argues, on good authority, hers, that the single biggest cause of global warming is the menopause.........I dread to think of the hormonal effect this has had on the Brexit talks, as this has been a sizzling long summer, but it does go a long way to explaining why Trump got so hot and bothered over the New York Times editorial leaks from the White House, which have never seemed to upset him before!

Thankfully those eternal school summer holidays are coming to an end and the unremitting grandchildren minding – because obviously we have nothing better to do – is thankfully over and peace reigns, well at least until Christmas.

Sometimes we just want to quit being women altogether. We want to throw our hands in the air and say, 'All right! You've got it. You have finally figured us out. We're not pretty. we're not thin, and we love our six packs so much that we protect them with layers of fat. We are not intelligent therefore we do not deserve to use our voices. We'll start wearing sacks and hide in a corner. All our self-worth is based on what you can see.'

But then we think, STUFF that ... I am a woman with thoughts and questions and important things to say and do. I'll say if I'm beautiful. I'll say if I'm strong. You will not determine my story -- I will!

Sometimes the strongest women are the ones who love beyond all faults, cry behind closed doors and fight battles that nobody knows about. We have several of those in our WI at the moment and we would like them to know that since they have always been there for everyone else, we are now there for them.

Also, we ladies are not known for complaining because if we are suffering badly from real flu symptoms, we quietly partake of a swig of brandy followed by a swift peak at the latest episode of 'Bodyguard' to fuel our imagination and then get on with our daily tasks, whilst the opposite sex just start writing their wills!

Now there are many theories about arguing with a woman and none of them works because women have more imagination than men. After all men need us to tell them how wonderful they are, but equally they have to be aware that if we say we'll be ready in five minutes, they still have time to clean out the garage, put out the bins and go for a pint at the pub before returning home to open the door for us as we leave.

In fact we ladies could be compared to diesel engines. It may take a little fuel, hopefully in the form of chocolate, and a few drops of oil, ( WD40 will do but almond oil is better ), to warm us up, but once we are lovingly prepared we can run for a long, long time.

Whereas men, on the other hand, are more like..............well, bottle rockets!

I feel sorry for the male species, as by the time they think they can read us like a book, their library card has expired, and they have no energy left to go through the process of renewing it.

A word of advice for those ladies who may still be searching for someone, even after reading all of my wise words, stop waiting for Prince or Princess Charming to come (we have to be politically correct nowadays), get up and find them, the poor idiots may be stuck up a tree or something!

September Members Meeting

To the uninitiated, a 'Members Meeting' is just what it says on the label. The President and Committee Members stand down and let the chosen members run the show! In the past this has been known to have a disastrous effect on us as we are normally used to the smooth and predictable format of our meetings, although it could just be the side effects of our various medications that make us think like this.

However this month we were putty in the very capable and experienced hands of Kath Disley and Doreen Hubbard. Believe me, these are women with authority, not to be messed with!

Joan Vernon, a member of the WI for eighty years, had sadly passed away recently and so our thoughts were of this gentle, unassuming lady during our harmonious rendering of 'Jerusalem'.

Joan was the only surviving WI member who had worked on the hand embroidered tablecloth made in 1953 and was also responsible for embroidering the trees on our present Audlem WI tablecloth which is used at each meeting.

After dealing with important WI business – don't forget ladies, Fish and Chip Supper Quiz Thursday 25th October, tickets £7.50 to be hosted by no less than Ralph Warburton BEM – Kath warmly introduced our speaker for the evening, Hazel Wallace, who gave us a talk on 'Beanstalk'.

Hazel explained the difficulties that teachers face in finding time to read with every child, especially when English is not their first language. Twenty one percent of children are dyslexic and need extra help whilst there are no less than 240 different languages spoken by ethnic minorities in this country, so we can all understand the problems that most of our teachers now face.

Life is so much better when everyone can read well and express themselves confidently.
Beanstalk recruits, trains and supports volunteers to provide one-to-one literacy support in early years settings and in primary schools to children who have fallen behind with their reading.

Beanstalk's trained reading helpers transform the lives of the children they support, turning them into confident, passionate and able readers. Volunteers are an essential and valued part of Beanstalk and if you become a Beanstalk reading helper, you will make a lasting difference to a child's life as well as enjoying a unique volunteering experience.

For further information look up their website – https://www.beanstalkcharity.org.uk

Sue Davies gave a vote of thanks to Hazel, and eloquently shared her own memories of teaching children, especially those with dyslexia, and the joy on their faces when they successfully completed reading a book.

Hazel joined us for tea and biscuits, many of our members were teachers in a former life and they were enjoying recalling memories of those days.

This month's competition was 'A Favourite Book'. Personally I always have a copy of War and Peace on my bedside table, just in case I fade away before morning, people will then realise I am a reader of classics and I may temporarily go up in their estimation, that is until they go rummaging in my wardrobe for my funeral outfit and find Fifty Shades of Grey!

Shirley Firth won our competition with her book of 'Fuzzypeg Goes To School', I believe she has just completed reading it, Ann Knapper was second and Irene Cunliffe was third.

The raffle was drawn and Joy Taylor won the monetary prize with Lynn Wheeler winning the beautiful table flower arrangement. Now Joy is a lady of many talents, however her latest accomplishment is 'chief eye drops putter in', as she is in great demand by those ladies who have recently had cataract operations and live alone!

Once again Jackie Creber excelled herself with her beautiful birthday flower bouquets, hand picked and ribbon bound with love. We are a unique WI group as we use any profits made on our raffle to present each member with a bouquet of flowers in their birthday month – except for Jackie, who we feel deserves a creation made by the rest of us, poor thing!

This month's birthday ladies were Irene Cunliffe, Ann Knapper, Lin Nicholas, Christine Salisbury and Pat Winfield, all ladies who remain eternally young as they know that the elixir of life is a bubbling stream of Prosecco and laughter!

Finally, Kath rose to wish us all a safe journey home and we became ladies of the night as we scurried home in the dark!

See you all in October ladies.

Top Tip;

Ladies, dance like no one is watching. Because they're not. They're all checking their phones.

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