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Who is for Potholing ?

1st April 2024 @ 6:06am – by Drainspiration Crew
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Pothole and Sewer Issues

by The Drainspiration Crew

In a surprising turn of events in our village, where potholes and clogged drains have become an everyday problem, several locals have developed an unorthodox plan to tackle these ongoing predicaments.

Meet the POTHOLE initiative – People Organised To Help Overhaul Local Environments.

Yes, you read that right – this audacious group have expanded their mission from not just earmarking perilous potholes but clearing out clogged sewers because........well, why not?

This Audlem group of trailblazers, will don orange jackets with 'Cavity Avenger' printed on their backs. This is so they are not confused with ADAS, who are members of the 'Petal Pluckers Union'. ADAS will be snipping creatively alongside this group, using the rain from the potholes to water their floral fantasias, whilst the gunge, including the bonus of some recent rich slurry deposits, will be removed from the sewers to enhance tub compost.

Armed with shovels and wheelbarrows, and hopefully having 'borrowed' an asphalt truck from Cheshire East, they will be doing a meticulous job, unlike those 'professionals' who have gone before with their namby-pamby roughshod work!

The group's founder, affectionately known as the 'Gunk Gladiator and Asphalt Alchemist,' rallied the villagers in a speech at our local Public Hall last week, proclaiming, 'Audlem will no longer be a four wheeled obstacle course with Olympic swimming pools at every dip!'

As the POTHOLE volunteers commence on this bizarre mission, one thing is clear, our village flower tubs will be so stunning even garden gnomes will be requesting selfies with them to boost their gnome-esteem!

Audlem, watch out for this new Initiative – they're coming to save the day, one pothole at a time!

Click on the images to enlarge !

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