CONKERS!

photo copyright Andrew Dunn

CONKERS! More conkers. And yet more conkers.

Over the past couple of weeks, I have been clearing conkers from my drive and lawn; enough to fill more than four wheelie bins. And even now the damned things are still falling! This set me to thinking, what good are conkers? What can they actually be used for?

We can't eat them and as far as I am aware, pigs don't eat them, nor do horses, cattle or other live stock. Even the bushy tailed rat (squirrel) turns up its nose at them.

Because of so called health and safety young boys no longer hang them on a piece of string to engage in the battle of the 'king conker'. (I can remember it now, my 105-er champion conker, soaked in vinegar and stored in the airing cupboard to make it rock hard). And somehow Nat King Cole's "Conkers roasting on an open fire" just doesn't cut it for the lyrics of an Xmas song.

So, if anyone can tell me what use conkers are or can find a use for several hundred weights of conkers, they are more than welcome to mine, next year.

and the year after.....

and the year after that.....
,