Cheese On Toast

Seeing as though people will be wrapping at this time of year...see if you can wrap your heads around this.

Recently I visited a Cafe (not in Audlem and, to save embarrassment, I won't mention which one) and placed my order; "A cup of tea and cheese on toast please" I said. The lady's reply was "Sorry, we don't do cheese on toast but, you can have toast and some cheese".

I scratched my chin(s) and repeated; "I can have cheese AND toast but not cheese ON toast?" "Yes" she said. It was at that point I looked around for the TV cameras as I was sure this was a Candid Camera type stunt!
As I stood there looking confused (a look I have successfully mastered through years of training) she then said "Would you like me to go in the kitchen and ask?" "Er...yes please" I said.

When she went to ask a question that I pretty much knew the answer to already, that gave me a few seconds of thinking time. She returned with a definite "No". I said "When you said I can have toast and cheese...what form does the cheese come in?" "In a pot" was the reply. "No, I mean what is the cheese like" said I. "Grated". Hmmmm....the lady then followed that up with "so you can put the cheese on top of the toast if you like!" I said......"but I can't have cheese ON toast though?" "No"

I settled with egg on toast in the end as I was losing the will to live (like you probably are reading this) which, as was pointed out by someone in another cafe a week later, is marginally more difficult than cheese on toast!!!

Happy Christmas everybody.
Hot Rod Billy