Undercover operation in village centre

A new umbrella, armed with a battery of infra red heating devices that 'M' would have been proud of, has appeared outside the Lord Combermere and will bring much needed undercover protection from the elements to those sneaking outside the non-smoking pub for a quick drag. Perfectly proportioned for the pub's patio, the muted colour and discrete promotion of Belgium's Leffe beer brings a certain Continental 'Je ne sais quoi' to the village centre.

The Lord Combermere's licensee Stephen Nash is reported in this week's Chronicle as saying: "We decided to relaunch as a totally non-smoking venue. I would say that 99% of my customers , including the smokers, agree with me and are perfectly happy with the decision which is good news considering the outcome of last week's free vote (in Parliament) on the subject."

A total ban on smoking in public places is to be introduced next year. It is only to be hoped that the anti-smoking Stasi is unable to prove that the odd molecule of Environmental Tobacco Smoke can lodge undetected in the eaves of giant umbrellas, thus bringing untold risks to innocent non-smokers passing by.

This article is from our news archive. As a result pictures or videos originally associated with it may have been removed and some of the content may no longer be accurate or relevant.